PERSONAL / Uncategorized

Selfish

Once I became selfish, I put myself first.

Investing in yourself should be your biggest investment and if you do it correctly it will be your biggest and best investment.

Having faith in myself is something I did not have for a very long time, but I do now. Once I became selfish, I realized I could achieve anything I wanted to.

I just graduated college a couple weeks ago…it still feels surreal. It was a really difficult journey for me, college. As cliche that it sounds, college was a breaking point for me.

There were several times that university chewed me up and spit me out, many times that my papers would come back with so much error and feedback that I had to completely rewrite it.  Not only was this happening, but I was so concerned with other people, maintaining a healthy and hip social life and making sure everyone else was liking me.

This took a toll on my studies, not only would I sit in my room crying because a boy wouldn’t text me back but also if a close girlfriend was mad at me and not answering my phone calls, I felt like I was failing. Feeling like a failure, I had no determination or motivation to excel in school.

Many times I questioned was it even worth it to stay in class if I had nobody to talk to?20708425_10155741694394446_4878955235390568580_n (1)
Yes. It was worth it.

Once I became selfish, I made college my baby. I worked extremely hard to get my life back on track and studies in line. I went from academic probation to A’s and B’s in the last semesters of my school. I stopped worrying about everyone else and I grew into myself.

While I was focused on school, my close friends stayed by my side and supported me all the way. I also met some amazing class mates that had the same focus, and their college degrees were their goal and baby.

I had a boyfriend for a while, and although he was supportive of my last year of college, things just didn’t workout between us. Once I became selfish, I realized that was okay that things didn’t work out between us.

I love the person I became, and I continue to love the woman that I am becoming.

I would walk into a room making sure everyone liked me, and now I walk into a room and question if I like them. 

Once I became selfish, I became selfless with the people I love and care about because I finally learned to love and care about myself, so I can give the loves in my life the love they deserve. I deserve that love, too.

  

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One thought on “Selfish

  1. So much truth. Selfishness gets such a negative rap these days but it’s not a terrible thing if used correctly. Great job on becoming you and beautiful words. Stay true to yourself and stay beautiful in every way imaginable as you are now.

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